Howling For Her Alpha: A Howls Romance (Cursed Howlidays Book 2) Read online

  I leaned forward and pressed my ear up against the door. The sound echoed in my head. I’d never heard anything as crisp and smooth before.

  “What are you doing?” she hissed.

  “Listening.” And not just to her knock, but the sounds of the world. I could hear the snowflakes falling around us, the wind as it ruffled through my hair, and the sound of approaching footsteps.

  Gasping, I jolted back from the door.

  “Could you at least try and act normal?”

  My wide gaze shot to Piper’s. What the hell was normal? I was a human born to werewolf parents who was now becoming a werewolf. Hell, even I had trouble wrapping my head around that one.

  “Just stand there. And for the love of God, let me do the talking.”

  Talking. To the alpha. About this spell. I was so screwed.

  The footsteps came to a stop on the other side of the door. My heart stuttered, and my breath quickened. For a moment, I contemplated running. Forest surrounded Mathis’s house, and in the backdrop sat Whistlers Mountain. Wilderness and trees and natural wolves. Picturesque…and only mildly terrifying. Two days, the witch had said. Which meant no running. No escaping. No punking out. Easier said than done.

  The doorknob twisted.

  “Piper, I can’t—”

  Before I could finish my statement, the door swung wide open, and I froze.

  Sweet mother of Mercury. The world vanished and the moonlight dimmed until all that remained was him. With half-lidded eyes, I drank him in. The man towered over me, even at my five foot six height. A tall hunk of man meat. I wanted to plunge my fingers into his medium-length blond hair. The man was Thor reincarnate, scar and all. But it was the rest of him that held me captive. Especially the jade eyes watching me from the dark shadows of his entryway.

  “Juniper? Piper? Is something wrong?” He leaned out and gazed down his driveway.

  “You could say that,” Piper grumbled. “Can we come in?”

  And just like that, I knew she intended to toss me under the bus. I nudged her with my elbow, a response met with a hard glare. Oh, doggie. I was up shit creek here.

  Dark brows snapped low. Then he stepped back in the entryway and gave us room to enter. “Of course.”

  Nope. I didn’t want to go inside. “You know what, you two can talk. I’ll just—”

  Piper’s fingers dug into my elbow, and she wrenched me inside, careful to keep her body between Mathis and me. My nerves came alive, my skin crawling as I mimicked Piper and removed my heels.

  Ah, sweet relief. Heels weren’t my first choice of shoewear, and it showed in my slight limp as I hobbled my way through his hallway. Nothing looked familiar, though I rather liked his décor. It had the feel of a cabin with its dark-paneled hardwood, overstuffed furnishings, and ambient lighting.

  Steps away from the living room, Mathis jerked to a stop and turned, his nostrils flared. “What is that scent?” he demanded.

  Oh, shit. Piper hadn’t been kidding.

  Neither of us answered. What the hell was I supposed to say anyway? Oh, sorry, just me. I’m becoming a werewolf. Silent laughter chimed in my head.

  Gold light swelled within his eyes, and before I could stop him, he leaned over me and drew in a deep breath. I shivered, equally excited and terrified. Maybe I couldn’t remember him, but it seemed my hormones hadn’t received that message. I wanted to bury my nose in his throat, scrape his flesh with my teeth, run my tongue along the seam of his lips. Instead, I took Piper’s advice and tilted my head, baring my throat to him. The feeling was quite uncomfortable. And for the first time ever, I felt a foreign voice rise in my thoughts.

  Vulnerable. Defend yourself.

  I gasped, then clapped a hand over my mouth. Did that voice belong to my wolf? Excitement bubbled within me, and it took every ounce of restraint not to erupt with giggles. My wolf!

  “Juniper,” he growled, his breath hot against my skin. “What the hell is going on?”

  An excited squeal tore free of my throat. “I heard it! Piper, I heard it! Or her? Does your wolf have a sex? There’s so much I need to learn.”

  Except, neither of them seemed as enthusiastic as me.

  Piper’s mouth pursed with disapproval. “Alpha. Juniper sought out a witch tonight, and they struck a deal. The witch made her a full werewolf.”

  The monster looming over me froze.

  Hell, so did I. Werewolf I might be, but I felt like a skittish rabbit in his presence. The man leaked power. I felt it crawling over my skin, pricking at parts of me I’d never known existed. Every bit of common sense told me to bow my head in submission.

  But every bone in my body refused.

  So odd to be at war with myself. My thoughts screamed obedience, but my body rebelled. The human side rising up to protect me, perhaps?

  “You did what?” he snarled.

  Shit, shit, shit. We’d pissed off the monster. It wasn’t only the deep crease in his brow that gave it away, or the lip curled up over his teeth, but his scent. Hot and spicy, it surrounded me until I could think of nothing else.

  “It gets worse, I’m afraid,” Piper whispered.

  “Shut up,” I hissed. In what world was it intelligent to keep poking the bear? Let him calm down first.

  “The witch only gave her two days.”

  I watched as his fingers curled into tight fists. “Two days to do what, exactly?”

  Awkward. So very awkward.

  “To…uh…mate. If she fails—”

  A scalding flash of fury silenced Piper’s words before she could finish. And for the first time in my life, a whimper tore past my lips. Without thinking, my hand shot up and cupped my throat. I’d heard that sound before from the wolves, but never me.

  Mathis fell silent, but his rage felt like a hot lash against my skin. Against Piper’s previous suggestions, I lifted my chin and met his scorching gaze. It almost hurt to look at him. Liquid gold burned within his eyes—his wolf staring out at me. And even though I’d pissed him off, I still felt it beneath the surface, a slight pull toward him. Something that screamed mine.

  “Mate. With. Who?” he snarled in a savage voice.

  “Oh, God,” Piper whispered, her head bowed.

  “With who!” he shouted.

  “You, Alpha.”

  The gold flickered in his eyes when he blinked. “What?”

  “She, uh… She went to a witch and asked for a spell that would turn her into a full werewolf. The witch agreed with the condition that she choose a mate within two days. You, specifically. Otherwise…”

  Poor man looked gobsmacked. He cocked his head and regarded Piper. “Otherwise, what?”

  “Otherwise, she’ll become a real wolf. Cursed into that form for the rest of her life.”

  His eyes reignited. If I thought him pissed before, it was nothing compared to now. The air grew thick with power. I almost choked on it. Piper fell to her knees next to me, her hand waving in the air as she gestured for me to do the same. I felt his energy crackling down on me, but I refused to submit. The way I saw it, if we were to become mates, I refused to cow. Regardless of his strength.

  A response he watched with a keen eye.

  “Alpha,” Piper panted, “please.”

  He growled under his breath, then whirled away. Piper slumped to the ground and sucked in a shivering breath, a light sheen of sweat glistening on her brow.

  “What the hell were you thinking, Juniper?” he demanded. “I know Sloe said something to you. Is this because of her?”

  Sloe? You can’t even shift, her voice echoed in my head. Look around. Does it look like the pack would accept you? Something was missing, though.

  I frowned and probed the memory. The wedding was there, but in bits and pieces. “She said the pack would never accept me,” I murmured.

  On her hands and knees, Piper crawled toward him, her head hung low. I watched her with a heavy heart. That was something I would never do. At least I remembered growing up around werewolves an
d knew that you could never back down. If you did, you’d always submit.

  “Alpha. You should know there was a side effect of the spell. Juniper knew of the risks, but she took it anyway.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “One of the side effects was memory loss.”

  The tension in the room spiked. “And?”

  Piper drew in a deep breath. “The witch removed all her memories of you.”

  Boom. Self-implosion. Even I cried out when Mathis turned and unleashed his fury on his unsuspecting living room. Pillows flew across the space, his coffee table upturned. Then, with an enraged howl, he whirled around and slammed his fist into the nearest wall. I cringed into Piper, breath caught in my throat. Whatever beauty I’d seen in him vanished in the blink of an eye.

  Holy crap on a cracker.

  Fist lodged in the drywall, he turned his head and glared at me.

  I tamped back my fear, then glanced at Piper. Poor woman looked distraught. And it was all my fault. Time to step up. She’d done enough talking for the night. I was the one who had taken the spell. Patting her hand, I pushed away from her and straightened my shoulders, then met his stare head on.

  “Juniper?” he whispered, his voice a broken fracture.

  “I’m sorry, Alpha.” He cringed at the formal title. There was something here, I could feel it. As much as see it on his face. Devastation creased his eyes. “But no, I don’t remember anything about you.”

  His jaw tightened. “Piper. Go home. Now. Juniper, you’re staying the night.”

  I shared a glance with her, my brow climbing as I wondered what he had in store for me. My heart leapt into my throat as the worst possible scenario came to mind. No way in hell I was mating with him tonight. Or ever! Not a volatile and dangerous man like him.

  “To sleep,” he growled as he yanked his fist out of the drywall. Sheetrock and blood speckled his ragged knuckles, his pinky twisted at an odd angle. Geez. He must have gone to town in that one hit. “What kind of a bastard do you think I am?”

  I shrugged. I didn’t have an answer to that.

  “We’ll head back to the witch’s shop tonight and have her undo this spell.”

  My head jerked up. “I don’t want—”

  “I didn’t ask what you wanted,” he snapped as he pulled his finger straight and set it to heal. “You’re playing a dangerous game, little wolf. And you’re in no position to argue with me.”

  “But—”

  “Juniper,” Piper snapped. “Shut the fuck up.”

  Mathis rubbed his injured knuckles. “Then once everything is back to normal, you and I are going to have a long chat.”

  Well, that sounded ominous. “I have my own home. I remember that much. I don’t need to stay the night.”

  He sucked in a breath, his eyes slipping shut. “Is it so much to ask for you to listen to me?”

  “I…don’t think you actually want an answer to that.”

  “Piper. Out. Now.”

  “Yes, Alpha,” she said, her voice meek.

  I grabbed her arm before she could escape, my gaze darting between her and Mathis. “Why can’t she stay?”

  “Juniper.” That was all he said. Just my name. But his tone had softened. “Let go of her so she can leave.”

  After a moment’s hesitation, I released her. Not that the rest of me was as convinced. The last thing I wanted was to spend the night alone with this man. I didn’t know him, and what I’d learned here tonight hadn’t been promising. Prone to violence and a quick temper. Thanks, but no thanks. I knew a warning sign when I saw one. I’d just have to find another way to solve this conundrum of mine, without mating.

  “Um…where will I sleep?” I asked.

  “In my room.”

  I watched as Piper vanished around the corner, the sound of the door slamming shut echoed through the house.

  “What about you? Where…where will you sleep?”

  He gave a bitter laugh. “Don’t worry about it.”

  Easier said than done. And now, I was alone with him. Disconcerting, to say the least. But if I was stuck here for the rest of the night, the least I could do was look at his injuries.

  So, with a sigh, I crossed the room and gently took his hand.

  He stared down at me, his eyes narrowed and mouth grim.

  “Come on,” I murmured. “Let me help you get cleaned up since this was my fault.”

  Another bitter laugh, but at least he didn’t argue. I led him toward the kitchen and pointed at the nearest chair. I knew the moment I did it, I’d made another faux pas. No one ordered the alpha around. But rather than acknowledge my mistake, I waited to see how he handled it.

  He rolled out his shoulders and cricked his neck, then sat.

  Huh.

  Maybe I really did have a little sway over this creature.

  I reached for a cloth and ran it under the tap, then wrung it out. When I turned around, he pushed the nearest chair out with his foot and gestured for me to sit. A smile tugged at my lips. Quid pro quo, hey?

  Once seated, I lifted his hand and placed it on my lap. The startling sound of his heart skipping a beat snapped my gaze up. I lifted a brow.

  A sardonic smile twisted his lips. “What? Thought I had no interest in you?”

  My pulse fluttered, but I shrugged. “I honestly don’t know what to think right now.”

  “I’d ask you why you did this, but I already know why. Tonight, at the wedding, you told me that you hate being human.”

  I nodded. That much I knew. I ran the cloth over his knuckles, mindful of his wounds as they closed. “My humanity stood in the way. The pack would never accept me.”

  “Hey.” He drew his hand from mine and touched my chin. Something flickered in the back of my mind. A whisper of a memory, perhaps. “Your humanity never bothered me. It’s who you are.”

  “Were,” I muttered.

  “Are,” he repeated. “You’re Juniper Johnson, human extraordinaire. It never mattered to me that you couldn’t shift. You have so much more going for you. You’re beautiful, intelligent, creative as fuck… I wish I could have told you all this tonight. Just another reason to bash Conrad’s head against a wall.”

  I blinked back tears. As far as I could remember, this was the first time someone had ever said anything nice about me, other than my parents. “It doesn’t matter anymore. I’m a werewolf now. Or will be if we…”

  “Juniper, you don’t even know me. I’m not going to hop into bed with you.”

  Equal parts relief and disappointment crested over me. Something grumbled in the darkest corner of my mind. Sounded almost like…a growl? I gasped and jerked in my chair, my head cocked as I listened for any other signs of my wolf. I’d heard her voice before, but this was a far more visceral reaction. As though she disliked what he had to say.

  “What?” Mathis straightened, his eyes narrowed as he surveyed the room. “What’s wrong?”

  “I heard her again.”

  “Her who?”

  “My wolf.” I lifted my hands to my mouth and giggled. “Oh, you can’t imagine how this feels.” At the sight of his raised brow, I burst into a full laugh. “All right. Maybe you can. It’s just so wonderful.” I reached down and clutched his hands. “I don’t want to lose this. This is who I am. Some trick of nature denied me my wolf. But I have a chance now, don’t you see that?”

  “I’m starting to,” he commented as he extricated his injured hand from mine.

  “Do you know what I do remember about my life?”

  He inclined his head.

  “Hating the night of the full moon. Watching from the shadows as the pack shifted and ran together. Hearing you all howl and play together. This pack is the only family I’ve ever known, but I’m not a part of it.”

  “Juniper—”

  “Let me finish. Maybe seeking out the witch wasn’t my brightest decision, but it was also my only choice. This isn’t all about you. It’s about me as well. Finding a place with
in my family. Becoming whole after an entire life of feeling broken and neglected. I don’t want to be a wolf just because I want you. I want to be a wolf so I can finally be me.”

  He stared at me, his expression soft with awe. “I never realized.”

  “Why would you?” A broken sob slipped past my lips. “The only time people pay attention to me is when they’re calling me names and telling me how useless I am. I never meant to hurt you, though. And if this upsets you…”

  “If? Juniper, this is killing me. We have two days to fix this mess you’ve gotten yourself into. Otherwise, I lose you forever. Did you ever stop and think about that?”

  Emboldened by his confession, I brushed my thumb over his freshly healed knuckles. “If that’s how you feel, then you know what we need to do.”

  “Yeah.” He scoffed under his breath. “Mate with a woman who doesn’t even know who I am.”

  “If it helps, the witch said my memories should come back once we fulfill the spell.”

  “Should,” he repeated, his face stern. “I didn’t want it to happen this way.”

  “Do you mean that? Or do you just not want me?”

  “Juniper…”

  “It’s a fair question,” I stated. “And we’re practically strangers now, so…”

  He sighed and rose from his seat. His fingers threaded through my hair, guiding my head up until our gazes met. He leaned over me, our mouths an inch apart. My pulse thumped in my head, my whole body coming alive with the promise of a kiss. Maybe I couldn’t remember him, but every other bit of me knew him.

  “No matter what, you will never be a stranger to me,” he whispered, his breath hot on my lips.

  My heart melted into a puddle of goo.

  God, I wanted to close the final gap between us. It was the strangest sensation to want someone I didn’t know so badly.

  He shifted and brushed a light kiss against the tip of my nose, then straightened and headed toward the front door. “Let’s go.”

  “What? Go where?” My head was spinning, I couldn’t keep up.

  “To the witch. She’s going to reverse this.”

  His words cut to the quick. “Didn’t you hear a word I said?”

  He paused and glanced over his shoulder, his brow furrowed.